NaPoWriMo starts tommow

hey so  i haven't  posted any thing here for awhile so about  that I've been pretty busy with school work and such BUT  tomorrow is the first day of April and is National Poetry Month and i  am doing NaPoWriMo  writing challenge so for  the next month i will be writing one poem  per day every day for the month of April  and im also  gonna try to  vlog as well  i need to get  back into poetry   it   used  to help me get through things i need now  cause i almost feel as  if im emotionally  num also i kinda hope to start  reading in  person as well its  alot to  do one month  but I've but putting it off for years so this my year hopefully ill see you tomorrow  or later happy writing

Promise

by Rachel Herskowitz( me)

Promise me you will try

Because you can try

of course you can

Promise me you won’t give up.

And no maybes it’s a def

Because YOU have a voice and you need to speak

Promise me that no matter what happens you won’t let go of the rope

Promise me that you won’t let them over power you

Cause you need to show them that your stronger then that

Nothing should over power you absolutely nothing

Giving up is not an option            

you have to try

don’t give up

I promise

so if you saw my  last  post the video time line  this pome should be some what  filmier it  was  the  first  pome I  did a  video of!





Fake till you Make it that's what everyone says have something you hate about your self well pretend you can do it or you already are that way for a time and you'll start to believe it and then it will come true well I've been pretending or act like I have confidence and high self esteem for almost if not have of my life and I still don't really believe in my self I can say ““i” believe in myself” I could even say “I BELIVE IN MY SELF”If I was foursed to. the same-thing if you would ask me I thought I was beautiful on the spot I would say yes but I would not be making eye contact ask me to look at my self in the in mirror and say 'I am beautiful' I couldn't do it I would run away and make excuses thats what faking it taught me to run away and make excuses

so have most  pepole and  i'm assuming here  have  heard of  "faking it till you  make it"and  im not  trying  to say  that  the hole

consept  is  out of wack,it might work very well for some  pepole or it  could be good  for  small time periods like  for a job interveiw  lets say normally your a very shy person but now  you have  this job intveiw so you make shour  dressed  proprly  you  practice  making  eyeconect you paractice speaking.you  go  in and even though  your so  nerveose  you want  to  run away  as  far and as  fast as  you can you dont you  go  into  the inveiw with  fake confedance but  you dont realize  it and   you  asce  the interveiw got a job.however predenteng  you have  condefdince when you dont  for a live  time  is  diffrent i  think again  this  based  on my  opiotion.

Poetry video time line

Promise 

My very first poem video

Words

right  or  wrong

you  cam  do  it

one of  my  very first  poems

Voice 

this was  when i  started  to  experiment  with  the  concept of having  a voice

there's a lot going on now (first time)

there's a lot going on now(2nd time)

Push past

I am not a robot

Beautiful
was inspired by +Jason Fonceca

Theres alot going on now full final result

So this  is a  time line  of  my videos from earliest to  latest video they  don't  have dates  but  I used my  YouTube account to organize them from my  first to my last and  you can see the transformation I've  had  form having no  voice  being completely pessimistic down to  having  a voice  I'm  definitely more confident  but still doubt myself alot. Its still a big transformation  and I'm really proud of how far I came and I know it  will get  better.but  I'm not going to say  i don't have the  doubts and what if's,and i cant's  barbecue  they still exist  for me .Sometimes I  wonder why i do this why do anything I do why i don't CS or KMS .Society says we should ignore these feeling that  their wrong but the thing that  I  learned is  its ok  to  have these feelings, yes I said its ok  to have these feelings.Every has  them at  one  point at lest.Its  impotent  to  acknowledge  them it  is my  belief that for  me these feelings are  apart of  me they  will never go a way knowing  that  is  bittersweet on   hand  it  gives me  a hand up because it means  no  surprises because i know it  will happen but I  can  accept it and  move on each  time on the other hand its knowing that  is  kind of sad  it  could make be lower  my  standards at  some  point  but  it hasn't yet. So  this  is Part of  poetry  journey  a small part that will be added to but part of still.
I would love to  know  what you think of it or  about a   journey of yours.

My Poetry why i write and what its about

It's funny how many people know  hate poetry and i wondering  for long  time  why people hated it so much.Now i realize school  was probably  one of  the biggest reasons was because of school and  how it was taught,you had to analyze it,find the meaning  of them  but truth is  no  one well know the actual meaning unless that person tells us all that  really did was torture the students.It shouldn't be about why the person wrote what they wrote it should be about how those words make you feel you can control how you feel but you cant say you understand stand why they wrote it in the first place because the fact is you don't.

To me poetry is a to express my feelings its how vent ,when I write I go in to the deep truths that I'm to scared to use use my verbal voice for. Wait no correction that I was to to scared to use my verbal voice to express but that changing now. A lot of different people helped get to the point were I am today family and friends(more friends then family)and there are there's these two bloggers who I have really helped me see things differently their both about keeping it real first is Alden Tan  inspired me to take the risk of making this blog in the first place and other people tried but there bullsh*** made things so complected,but I wouldn't have even known about Alden's blog if I didn't find Ryze and met the amazing +Jason Fonceca  who is such an inspiration to me he is by far the best people I have ever had connect with he so trustworthy that I was able to ask him to listen to some of my most deep thought s so I could heal. A conversion with him was never shallow and it was because there were literally no judgment made that it so easy to talk to his just amazing.

My poetry is all about being yourself and being proud of who you are and not caring if other people think you suck or not. It's how I keep the fire in side my self from dieing out .Its how I deal with the crazy emotions I have its the one thing I know I can do well ,and that why it has got me this far.

This is me!

Yep that’s me ,that’s the real me i could have posted a prom pic or a school pic but one of the biggest themes in my poetry is being honest and being real and acknowledging how beautiful the real me is yep that’s it